Failsafe Aftermath
by Sohotthateveryonedied
Summary: It's the first night after the traumatic failsafe simulation, and the team finds themselves pummeled by nightmares and guilt after the unbearable horrors they experienced. Contains lots of fluff, snuggling, and also Spitfire and Supermartian.


**I own nothing!**

It was cold. Wally could hear M'gann yelling in his head, but it sounded distant among the other thoughts screeching at him. He moved faster than the others. He could see the beam headed straight towards Artemis before they did. He could see the fear on her face as she saw it coming for her. His speed made him see what took five seconds to occur happen in what felt like an hour.

It happened slowly, like a movie set on slow motion. He could see the ship behind Artemis as it powered up its disintegration beam, prepared to destroy her. Artemis turned and notched an arrow, but she wasn't fast enough.

Wally couldn't think. He couldn't see anything except for Artemis. Couldn't comprehend anything other than the fact that she was in danger and he was her only chance.

Wally ran as fast as he could to where she was, but he too was moving slowly, like he was running through mud. He was screaming, willing himself to be fast enough. Pushing himself as fast as he could go to save her.

And right before his eyes, when he was only a few feet away, Artemis was engulfed in an odd yellow light and just like that -

Gone.

Wally found himself grabbing empty air as he watched Artemis fade away into nothing but dust. No no no no no no no. She can't be gone. No!

He wasn't fast enough.

He failed her.

She was gone.

And that feeling of loss and grief consumed Wally. Grabbing at the empty air he sank to his knees, screaming as loud as his lungs would allow him. Artemis was gone forever, and all he could do was scream.

Wally suddenly jerked awake, his mouth forming a silent scream like in his dream. It took him a while to regain his composure, to remember that it was only a simulation, and when he did he fell back against the pillows groaning. It was the first night since the training simulation, and this was the third time since Wally had gone to sleep that he'd woken up from a nightmare.

He didn't know why this was getting to him so much. Sure, the simulation was traumatizing, but Wally was supposed to be the laid back one. He wasn't supposed to fall apart like this, he wasn't allowed to let anything get to him. Then again, practically his entire team was going through the same exact thing, so at least he wasn't alone in his trauma.

He checked his alarm clock. It was midnight, so he'd only been asleep for a few hours. He still remembered just six hours earlier when he and the rest of the team had awoken from the simulation.

M'gann had cried for hours with Conner holding her as she sobbed into his shoulder. And even beneath his tough exterior, it was clear that Conner was just as shaken as well. Kaldur hadn't spoken much. He kind of just sat with his head in his hands, probably blaming himself for what happened.

Dick put up a tough front at first, refusing to break down. But it didn't take long for even him to succumb to the harsh feelings brought on by the trauma, and he ended up falling apart in Batman's arms, sobbing into his father and mentor's chest. Wally wanted desperately to go and hug his best friend, but he'd been frozen.

It was like Wally just went numb after he woke up. He could still remember everything like it actually happened. It was all so vivid, and he doubted he would ever forget it for as long as he lived. He remembered dying in that mother ship. It hurt. Not physically, but they could still feel pain while they were in the exercise, even if it didn't actually affect their bodies. He remembered the heat of the explosion, he remembered Dick grabbing his hand, but most of all, he remembered his last thought being of Artemis.

That part was strange to him. He hated Artemis. She was his rival, and yet throughout the entire mission his one concern had been finding a way to save her. And he knew that it wouldn't be possible. He knew she was gone and that it was unlikely there was a detention facility, but he kept hoping, for he knew that if he accepted that Artemis was gone there was no way he would have been able to continue. He would have given up just then and there and waited for the aliens to kill him. So he stayed in denial.

He'd watched her when they woke up, but he didn't speak to her. He wanted to hug her, to touch her, to keep her in his arms so she would never get away again, but he didn't. Why was he so focused on Artemis? Everyone he loved died in that training scenario: Barry, Iris, Mom, Dad, Kaldur, Conner, Dick, Black Canary, Red Tornado, all of humanity was doomed in the end, and yet his only thought was Artemis.

After a few hours Batman had sent the team to their rooms for some sleep. They weren't physically tired because they'd been in comas for the majority of the day, but mentally and emotionally they were exhausted. The whole team ended up staying at the cave, as they were all too shaken up to go home.

Wally wondered if the others were having as restless a sleep as he was. He had a feeling that if he tried falling asleep again he'd just have the nightmare over and over again like he'd had every time he closed his eyes, so he reluctantly got out of bed. He robotically shrugged on a t-shirt from his floor that he assumed was clean enough to wear. He was too tired too care.

He left his room and slowly walked though the dark hallways of Mount Justice. He didn't know where he was going exactly, but he didn't really care anyway. It felt nice to move. Usually whenever he was upset he'd run as fast as he could for hours upon hours. That feeling was calming to him, but he wasn't up for going any faster than a normal human pace at the moment. Still, even walking felt good.

After a while Wally felt his stomach growl, and he remembered that he hadn't eaten since long before the training exercise. He went to the kitchen and dug around in the fridge before pulling out a package of Oreos. He ate a couple as he carried the package to the living room in preparation to kick back with some television, but upon entering the living room he realized that someone was already there.

There, looking smaller than usual all curled up on the couch, was Dick. He sat very still with his eyes almost looking through the tv, like his thoughts were miles away.

Wally quietly approached and sat beside his friend, not speaking. Dick didn't move, and Wally wondered if he even knew he was there. After a few minutes of comfortable silence, Wally finally spoke.

"Hey," he whispered softly. Dick flinched at the sudden break in silence, but he didn't respond.

Wally scooted closer and put a comforting arm around his closest and youngest friend, pulling him into his side. Dick sunk naturally into the embrace, although his face was still stoic. "How you holding up?"

Dick shrugged. "I'm fine," he answered. His voice was lifeless, like his thoughts were miles away.

Wally scoffed quietly and held out the tray of Oreos, and Dick took one. "What are you doing up so late?," Wally asked. "Doesn't Bruce have strict rules with getting to bed and waking up early and stuff?"

Dick shrugged again, taking a bite of his Oreo. "He said I won't be doing Robin stuff for a couple weeks. Said I need time to recover or whatever. And I couldn't sleep, so..." His voice trailed off at the end, and he ducked his head lower.

"Nightmares?" When Dick nodded, Wally pulled him tighter into his side, nodding. "I know. I keep getting them too. What were yours about?"

While Dick was a private person by nature, he let his guard down around a select few, one of whom was Wally. He thought about staying silent, but his mouth spoke almost without his meaning it to.

"Failing. Failing Bruce, you guys, the world, all that stuff. Which is pretty much what happened, I guess. I was supposed to be the leader, but instead I wound up getting all of you killed," he whispered, his voice sounding especially young now.

Wally chewed a cookie, looking down at Dick. He was so small and young... He didn't deserve to have gone through that simulation. Then again, none of them really did.

Wally hummed, keeping his eyes locked on the television. "Mine were about Artemis dying over and over and over again. And I wasn't fast enough to save her, even though I'm supposed to be the fastest kid alive and all that." He clicked his tongue. "I don't really know why, though. It's weird. I don't even like her, but I keep seeing her and no one else in my dreams. Not even Uncle Barry, you, Kaldur, nobody but Artemis." He wrinkled his nose. "It's annoying."

He started slightly when Dick let out a quiet laugh, as it didn't sound anything like his normal carefree giggles. It sounded tired, almost dead. It was unnerving. "What?," he asked.

Dick shook his head. "You really are clueless, you know that?" But he laughed again, and this time there was more life to it, which was comforting to Wally. It told him that while Dick and the rest of the team was having a hard time, he would be okay. Eventually.

Xxxxxxxxxx

M'gann clenched her eyes tight as she trampled by the nightmares she could hear from the other occupants of the cave. Never more than that moment did she wish she didn't have telepathy. With her powers, even without trying, she could hear the silent screams of her friends as they were tormented by the memories of the training exercise.

She hadn't even tried sleeping, as she knew that she would only suffer the same fate as her friends in an unconscious onslaught. She looked at Conner, studying his face. After the team had been sent to bed they decided to stay in her room for the night. (Not for that reason, ya nasties, they're only 16!) They hadn't been apart for more than minutes at a time since they all woke up.

Experiencing the loss of Conner made M'gann realize that she never wanted to be away from him again, and he felt the same way, so they decided that staying together would make it easier to cope. She'd spent the past hour cuddled on his chest, feeling his lungs rise and fall as he breathed steadily. Unlike her, he seemed to have no problem sleeping.

He'd been different though, ever since they all woke up. He was as stoic and protective as usual, but there was something... off. She didn't know how to describe it. He was understandably angry with the league for putting them through all that, but only because he needed someone to blame, and it sure wasn't going to be his girlfriend. But still, it felt like he was hiding something from her. She could have probed his mind to learn for herself, but she'd never do that to him. So she was left wondering what that training exercise had done to him.

She was interrupted in her curiosity by Kaldur. He, like the rest, was obviously having a nightmare as well. He was dreaming about failing his team and consequently the world, and M'gann could feel the anguish deep in her bones. Despite knowing it wouldn't help at all, she clamped her hands over her ears in a hopeless effort to block out the thoughts. His emotions were so... so potent and earnest and _painful_. It hurt just to listen as he pictured himself dying, being reduced to nothing but dust. And then the entire planet and all of humanity was destroyed, all because he failed to be there for his team.

M'gann wanted desperately to comfort him, but Kaldur was much more distant than the rest. He went to no one for comfort after they all woke up, instead choosing to suffer in silence. He felt like it was his responsibility to remain strong for the others, even if it meant he had nobody to go to when he needed it. He had the weight of the world on his shoulders, and M'gann wished desperately to relieve him of the burden. She felt bad for intruding, but as hard as she tried she couldn't shut out the team's collective emotion.

She tried to focus on Conner's deep breaths to take her mind off the onslaught she could feel only rooms away. But it didn't work, as she found herself forced to listen to what felt like screaming as Kaldur dreamed of failing his team. And Wally mentally berating himself for not being fast enough. And Dick sobbing silently in his sleep. M'gann wished that she could just turn her powers off so she wouldn't have to hear it all, but she couldn't.

And for what felt like the millionth time that night, she found herself crying again. Conner stirred. He opened his eyes to find M'gann sobbing quietly into the fabric of his shirt. " _You okay?,_ " he asked her in his mind.

M'gann looked up with tears in her eyes, which Conner wiped away. _"Sorry I woke you up,"_ she apologized. _"I just can't stop thinking about it."_ She hiccupped as a flash of a memory came from Artemis. One of burning and pain as she was disintegrated. M'gann grimaced and allowed more tears to fall. _"I can hear their nightmares,"_ she whispered in her mind _. "I keep trying to make it stop, but they're too loud. I can't turn them off."_

Conner rubbed her shoulder affectionately, kissing the top of her head. _"It'll be okay. We all just need a couple days, and then everything will be back to normal,"_ he assured her.

M'gann looked up at him. _"How are you? You haven't said a word about what you're feeling yet. Are you okay?_ "

Conner gave her a reassuring albeit tight smile. _"I'm fine. I'm strong. You don't need to worry about me,"_ he said. He didn't allow himself to think about how he really felt during the exercise, because he knew M'gann would be able to hear it. And he couldn't let her know that throughout that horrible, traumatizing simulation, he was content. She would be disgusted with him if she knew, and she would have good right to be. Heck, he was disgusted with himself.

M'gann was confronted by a similar predicament, and as she severed their link and cuddled closer to Conner, she thought about what he would think if he knew what she really was.

It's bad enough that it was her fault the whole team was traumatized by the debacle, but learning she was a white martian? If he knew what she truly looked like he'd hate her. He'd think she was ugly. He'd assume it was her white martian violent naturethat made her screw up the exercise. He, along with the rest of their friends and mentors, would blame her. He would _hate_ her.

As she again focused on Conner's breathing to calm herself, she worried about what would happen, now that they all knew what she was capable of. What if she messed up again? What if next time it was worse than simply hijacking a training simulation? And at that moment she made up her mind. She was going to suppress her powers as much as possible.

She wasn't going to mess up again.

Xxxxxxxxxx

Artemis lay awake in her bed, staring up at the ceiling as she had been since she'd gone to her room hours earlier. She was tired, but for some irritating reason she couldn't fall asleep no matter how hard she tried.

She tried clearing her head, but the thoughts of her weakness and failure kept crawling back. This was all her fault. If she'd just been faster and smarter she wouldn't have died, and then her friends wouldn't be hurting right now. This was all her fault. Then again, what wasn't?

She probably deserved it. After all, she was the one who was still lying to her friends daily about her identity even though trusted her with their lives every day and vice versa. If they found out they would surely kick her off the team, but she probably deserved that too.

Artemis wondered what the rest of the exercise must have been like for them. She hadn't asked yet; everyone was just so fragile about it. And even if she did ask, she wasn't really sure if she wanted to know all the horrifying details. Seeing everyone die, seeing the world slowly being taken over and being powerless to stop it, it all sound so awful.

She soon got fed up with sitting still for so long, so she dragged herself out of bed and shoved her feet into her slippers, leaving the room. Maybe walking would make her tired.

She went to the living room, but upon entering she realized that the room was already occupied. There on the couch sat Wally and Robin, both watching television and sharing a package of Oreos. They must have heard her approach, for they both turned around and saw her standing there.

She debated whether she should stay or go back to her room, when Robin gave her a friendly smile. "Hey, Artemis. Trouble sleeping?" He seemed unusually chipper for a kid who went through one of the worst experiences of his life just a few hours ago, but that's when Artemis spied a couple of dried tears hiding almost unseen under his glasses. He must have been trying to hide his weakness in front of her. Poor kid.

Walking closer and sitting next to the pair on the couch, she shrugged and swiped an Oreo. "Yeah, I got bored trying to sleep so I came out here. After being in a coma for most of the day, I guess I'm just not tired," she said. It was a lame attempt at humor, but instead it just sounded sad. She didn't have the effort to even smile.

And like that, the friendly atmosphere was gone, replaced by only melancholy tension.

Wally's face fell at the memories again of Artemis dying, and he clenched his hand into a fist. Robin flinched as well, and Artemis frowned. "Sorry," she muttered. "Too soon." She pulled her legs up to her chest and wrapped her hands around them. "Just trying to lighten the mood, I guess."

There was silence after that, as the three were all trapped in their thoughts, reflecting again on the horrors of the mission. Artemis, though, still didn't know the entirety of what happened. Yes, she knew that they all died in the end and that essentially the world was doomed, but she still wasn't filled in on the details. It was a bad idea, but she needed to know. She needed closure. So softly it was barely heard, she asked, "So what happened after I... After I left the simulation?"

Neither boy answered, though Robin bit his lip and she caught the tightness in Wally's jaw. "...Was it bad?"

Wally closed his eyes and nodded, swallowing thickly. "Yeah," he bit out. "Yeah, it was bad."

"I'm sorry," she whispered, laying her chin on her knees.

"For what?," Robin asked. For some reason his voice sounded especially young now, which was odd compared to the mature persona he usually displayed. She found herself reminded that he was still only thirteen. "For dying first? That could have been any one of us," he pointed out.

Artemis unwillingly remembered the heat of the ray that killed her, and she dug her nails into her palms. "For messing up the mission. It was my fault I died. I wasn't vigilant enough to see it coming, so it's my fault everything went wrong in the first place.

Wally's jaw dropped and his green eyes locked on her face. "Wah- Are you serious? You're not the one who failed, I am," he protested.

"How are you-"

"I'm the fastest kid alive, Artemis. I'm fast enough to run across the country in a few hours, but I wasn't fast enough to save you. If I had just moved, just gotten to you in the second - the _split second_ it would have taken me, you wouldn't have died. I'm the one who froze. I'm the one who let you die." His voice wavered and broke at the end, and Artemis found herself reaching for his shoulder.

She was about to say something comforting, but they were interrupted by a new voice behind them.

"It was my fault, not yours."

They looked back to see Kaldur moving to sit on the adjacent couch, looking as weary as they felt. He was wearing only a pair of pajama pants, but his skin looked slightly damp.

"Forgive me for intruding," he apologized softly, clasping his hands in his lap. "but I was taking a midnight swim and couldn't help overhearing. And I wanted you all to know that none of you are at fault for this debacle. It is I who should be apologizing."

Robin held out the Oreos package and Kaldur took one, nodding in thanks. "Why do you think it's your fault?," Robin asked. "You were the one who led us when we had no one, and you were the one who sacrificed himself so we could get away safely." Wally and Artemis nodded in agreement, but Kaldur's eyebrows creased.

He shook his head, lowering his eyes. "That is just it. I am the one who sacrificed himself. I am the one who abandoned you when you needed me most. I left you without a leader, and that was selfish of me. It was selfish to let myself die and leave you to take on the burden of being leader. And for that I am sorry," he said, raising his eyes to meet Robin's behind his sunglasses.

"At least you didn't go crazy with grief and make everyone forget we were in a simulation," a voice spoke up from behind the couch. M'gann stood there, hand in hand with Conner. She wore a pink nightgown, and Conner was in sweatpants and one of his Superman t-shirts. M'gann held a mug of tea in her free hand.

Kaldur gestured beside him for them to sit down, which they did, M'gann sitting on Conner's Lap with his arms wrapped around her. Robin offered them some Oreos, and M'gann took five.

"We do not blame you, M'gann," Kaldur assured her.

M'gann looked down, fiddling with the hem of her skirt as she munched an Oreo. "You should," she said softly. "You should all be angry with me. If I had better control over my powers we wouldn't be in the mess. You all wouldn't be having nightmares all night."

Wally tilted his head. "How'd you know about that?"

"I'm a telepath, remember? I wasn't even trying, but your emotions were so loud it's like you were screaming in your sleep. You're suffering, and that's all on me." A year fell onto her cheek, and Conner rested his head on her shoulder in comfort.

"It's not your fault," he told her. "I should have been stronger. If Superman had been there he'd have been able to save everyone himself. He would have beaten them all in minutes, but I'm not Superman. I'm not strong enough to be him, and I wasn't strong enough to save you."

There was some silence after that until Wally smirked wryly despite it not reaching his eyes. "Man, this is some guilt-off huh? Everyone blames themselves for what happened," he commented. Then his face fell. "Man, we really are messed up, aren't we?"

Artemis shrugged. "Yeah, but at least we're messed up together." They laughed hollowly at that, and the tension in the air dissipated for the most part.

Artemis bit into another Oreo, and if she happened to move a little closer to Wally until their legs were touching, she didn't notice. "Hey uh, I know the rest of what happened was traumatizing and you probably don't want to talk about it, but... How did you all... You know, die?" She winced when she saw the hurt that flashed across all their faces. "Sorry, it's just like... I kind of need to know what happened, you know?"

Kaldur nodded, his eyes fixed on the floor. "I understand. I was the first one after you. We were at the Hall of Justice, and we needed to zeta soldiers to the cave. I was the last one out, along with Martian Manhunter, but I forced him through before me and I wasn't fast enough to escape the beam." He spoke with a rough voice, and it sounded like he was trying to detach himself from what happened, like he was telling a story rather than a retelling of what killed him.

Robin drew his legs up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them, resting his chin on his knees. "Wally and I died together," he added. "We blew up the mothership, but we were trapped inside when it exploded. It sucked."

Wally nodded in agreement. "Yeah. Not planning on doing that again. Blowing up hurts. When I die for real, I think being disintegrated and evaporating like you guys did sounds way better," he laughed, trying to lighten the mood. But it did nothing, and after that they all went quiet again.

"So," Conner started, breaking the tense silence. "What now? Like you said, Wally, we're all screwed up. How long is it gonna be before we can actually get over this and be... well, normal again?" M'gann put a warm hand on his leg in reassurance.

Robin shrugged, looking down. "Batman mentioned something about Black Canary giving us PTSD counseling. I guess they think talking about it will help or something," he murmured.

Wally rolled his eyes. "Yeah, like talking about our giant failure will help," he muttered dryly, but he was overcome by a sudden yawn.

M'gann glanced at the clock on the wall. "It's late," she noted quietly. "We should probably get some sleep." But nobody moved.

Robin yawned too, leaning back against Kaldur's shoulder. "Nah," he muttered tiredly. "We'll probably just wake up five seconds later from nightmares, so what's the point?" It was a lame stab at humor, but nobody even tried to laugh. At this point any attempts to lighten the atmosphere were futile. There was no way to turn around what happened to them, no way to change the fact that that exercise broke them. They'd all accepted it, but they still tried to do whatever it took to make it bearable.

Wally finished off the Oreos before standing up and moving to the kitchen. His voice could still be heard by those in the living room as he talked tiredly while rummaging around in the pantry. "You know, movie nights always help with that. That's why I came here, actually."

Artemis picked up the remote and started flipping through channels. "Frozen is on," she acknowledged, leaning back against the cushions and curling into a ball there.

Wally came back into the living room, his arms piled high with popcorn, chips, cookies, and other sugary snacks that would help them stay awake longer. He dropped them onto the coffee table before sprawling out on the floor in front of Artemis, snatching up the remote. "Disney marathon it is," he announced, turning up the volume.

They watched several movies that night including Frozen, Brother Bear, Lilo and Stitch, Alice in Wonderland, The Lion King, Cinderella, Finding Nemo, and Cars. It was nice. For those brief hours it felt like maybe they could get back to normality. Spending time together, concentrating on the colorful characters on the screen instead of dying and failing the world, it all made it easier to avoid the lingering thoughts and memories of what they went through. By eight o'clock they were all asleep, but, unlike before, they had no nightmares.

Red Tornado found them like that in the morning. All six of them were asleep in various positions on the floor. M'gann had her head on Conner's chest, and his arms were wrapped around her protectively. Kaldur lay next to her, their ankles barely touching but enough to make it obvious that he was not ostracized. On his other side was Wally. Artemis lay on top of him, and his arms held her close despite the animosity that defined their relationship. He held her tightly, like he was afraid of letting her go. Her golden hair was in disarray and lay around them like beautiful seaweed. Robin had his head on Wally's legs with his hand held in Artemis' own, and his legs rested on Kaldur's lap. He looked so small compared to his friends.

The arrangement might look slightly odd to an outsider, but it was different for them. They were different from most friends, for after all they'd been through they grew to be more like family than just a team. They were tied to each other emotionally, and to get through something as traumatic as what they experienced, being with the people they trust most was the only thing that could provide comfort now.

The television was still on, but nobody was awake to watch it. Besides the low volume of the tv, all that could be heard were Artemis' soft snoring and the sounds of Conner muttering in his sleep.

Red Tornado watched for a moment before leaving the way he came, knowing it would be wise to let them sleep after what they'd been through the day before. But he didn't worry, for they would be all right. They were strong, and no matter what happened they would always bounce right back. They would survive together.

 **See what I did with the whole Wally would rather disintegrate than blow up thing? There's some good ole Endgame feels for you ;)**


End file.
